Hola!
Things have been developing so quickly in the Kramnik/Anand WCC match in Bonn that the
Showgirls can't keep up! But trust me - they's been writing reams of materials and emailing/texting/faxing it to me 24-7. Oy!
Rather than waiting until the weekend to assemble all of their reports into one harmonious (or not) whole, I've decided to publish some of their reports as they come in.
You can read the
Girls' coverage of the first 4 games, published at
Goddesschess late Sunday, October 19th - it will give you some much-needed background too on the Girls' rather complicated relationship with Vladimir Kramnik and some of what
really happened behind the scenes at the 2000 Brain Games World Chess Championship match in London between Kasparov/Kramnik.
Tonight I'm publishing the Girls' bulletins from yesterday and today, as hot off the presses as I can get them up and running here, given the time differential and my work schedule (out the door at 7:30 a.m., in the door at 6:30 p.m.)
Even the Girls cannot believe what has been going on - it's almost like a novel what's been happening in Bonn! But it's all true! Kramnik lost
again today,
once again falling victim in Game 6 to Anand's (1) d4!!!!! I couldn't even make this stuff up if I tried - and neither could the Girls!
Anand now leads at the half-way mark 4.5/1.5. Kramnik has only 6 games to frame and forge a comeback -- if he can. Can he? Bambi doesn't seem to think so. Candi seems to think the Girls can concoct some sort of Plan to help Vlady, er, Kramnik, out of his funk.
Here, without further ado, are the Girls' reports from Monday October 20 and today, October 21:
Monday, October 20, 2008, Paris:
Bambi: Okay, this should do it - Candi, tell me what you think of this report to Jan:
Dear Jan:
White (1) d4 has struck again - this time with disastrous results for Vlady! Unbelievably, in Game 5, Kramnik behind the white pieces played the move Vishy had played in Games 2 and 4! Well, he should have known - copycats always get short shrift! What was he thinking???
While the game involved some intriguing complications (oooh, we just love complications), it was clear after move 29.Nxd4?? that Vlady was lost - and lose he did, to go down 2 full points to Vishy by move 35! Everyone and his uncle is now saying what Vlady should have done was play 29.Ne3 and not swallowed the poison pawn!
It is obvious that this former World Champion is not himself - will he be able to recover? The match is only 12 games and in order to avoid a brutal play-off Vlady must win the match outright. So far, he hasn't proven that he can do anything behind the black pieces, and he only has white 3 mores times!
What will Vlady do for a come-back tomorrow? More importantly, will Vishy once again uncork (1) d4?
Bambi and Candi, Live from Bonn!
Candi: Bambi, that's a great report, but it sounds so professional - not quite like us. Do you think Jan will suspect something?
Bambi: Oh, I hope not! She can't possibly be reading every single word on the internet about this match - there are millions and millions of them. You know she doesn't care much for men's chess, but then, she
is a Goddess and she always seem to know things in a most uncanny way...
Candi: Writing from others' internet reports like
Polgar and
Mig isn't quite the same as being in Bonn live. Poor Vlady! You know, I feel guilty. I think we should go back to Bonn and actually cover the match live, like we promised we would. Maybe we could do something to help Vlady?
Bambi: Hmmmm, I've been feeling a bit guilty too. We can always come back to Paris for shopping once Vlady loses - I'm sure it won't take all 12 games!
Candi: Bambi! You are not - you are not rooting for Vlady to lose, are you?
Bambi: Of course not! I don't wish any ill-will on Vlady.
Candi: Bambi - I just have the eeriest feeling that something spooky is going on!
Bambi: Hold that thought - we'll talk about it when we get back to Bonn...
Tuesday, October 21, 2008, Bonn:
Candi: Bambi, oh Bambi, this is a DIS-ASTER!
Bambi: Calm down, Candi. Breathe, in ---- out ---- in ---- out ----. That's it. Now sit down, please. Have some Boobie Bottles Tea - here.
Candi: Oh, thank you! I feel much better. I think I was cyberventilating! But what are we going to do about this?
Bambi: Candi, please, there isn't anything we can do! We can't very well play the games for Vlady, after all, at least - not without cheating. And I would never ever do that in a millions years. And neither would you.
Candi: Well, all right, if you say so. But honestly - I told you yesterday - there's something really spooky going on here, and this proves it! Who could possibly have imagined Vishy playing (1) d4 yet again today in Game 6! Unbelievable! I've got chills running up and down my spine just thinking about it. Vlady is doomed, I tell you, doomed! He's hexed - it's come back to haunt him hasn't it - that hex he put on Kaspy back in London. Ohmygoddess! What are we going to do?
Bambi: Candi, read my lips - there-is-nothing-we-can-do.
Candi: I refuse to believe that. We always come up with a plan, don't we? Remember that time we were cornered in the Casbah in Algiers? And remember that time the pilot had a heart attack on our Cesna and yet we managed to land the plane without a scratch? And remember that time you painted the Black Putin's black labrador white and we had to improvise our escape at the last second because you'd gained so much weight you couldn't get your leg over the wall of the dacha?
Bambi: Candi! Don't tell our readers I was too heavy to climb over a brick wall! What will they think? Anyway, I've lost all of that weight and more. Imagine, Jan has started a weight loss plan too, without any prompting from us, and I never thought she'd do that! I think she's planning something spectacular for 2009 and will unveil her new svelt and sexy self in Las Vegas!
Candi: Hmmmm, maybe we can find a spot for her in the show -- oh, there you go, dissecting me again. I'm on to your tricks, though, Bambi. You can't fool me again! I am intending.
Bambi: Distracting, Bambi, not dissecting, and it's attending, not intending. Yes, you are too sharp for me.
Candi: My studying a ten-new-words list every day has vastly improved my vocalibation. Occasionally wearing my glasses helps, too. So - no more dissections! I think we can come up with A Plan.
Bambi: Hmmmm, Candi - take a look at this blog entry at Mig's:
Bartleby October 21, 2008 12:55 PM Reply
That's not him.Instead of playing the slow, quiet position slowly and patiently, he went for dubious activity.Does anyone know if he has fallen in love or something?
Candi: Bambi! Do you think it's true - Vlady is in Love!?
Bambi: Candi! Control yourself! He is a married man!
Candi: WHAT? Oh no he isn't. I KNOW he isn't!
Bambi: What are you talking about? For goddess sake, he's been married since December 31, 2006.
Chessbase did a big spread on the wedding, photographs and everything. They even got a piece of the wedding cake. Here - look, I've got the website on the laptop -
Candi: Oh, I feel faint, I'm sinking, sinking into the dark swirling mist of unconsciousness, sinking into the abyss of despair - death cannot be far behind -
-- whereupon Candi gracefully sinks to the bear skin rug in front of the fireplace in the library where the Girls were sitting in their rented villa on the Rhine River, her eyelids fluttering and then going still.
************************************
Oh my! What drama! Candi fainting - she never faints (trust me, I know, wink wink). What could possibly cause her to faint? Why was she sinking into the "abyss of despair"??? Why was she so certain that Kramnik was not married? Okay - enough telegraphing the story line (har!) No - wait! There's a big surprise coming - Jan, don't give everything away!
And at long last, the real truth about the Bambi/Candi/Kaspy/Vlady quadrangle will be revealed! As well as lots of other interesting stuff but all subsidiary to Sex! Shopping! Sex! Scandal! Sex! Sleeping! Yes! Yes! Yes!
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