Spying Squirrels!

Oh those squirrels - what will they be up to next? Reading an op-ed article in today's Wall Street Journal by Amir Taheri, "Domestic Terror in Iran" about the Islamic regime's internal crackdown on people mostly between the ages of 15-30, my eyes goggled at this: "Khomeinist paranoia reached a new peak last week when the authorities announced, through the Islamic Republic News Agency, the capture of four squirrels in the Western city of Kermanshah and claimed that the furry creatures had been fitted with 'espionage devices' by the Americans in Iraq and smuggled into the Islamic Republic." I confirmed the story by a visit to MSNBC's World Blog - here is an entry from July 20: IRAN'S SPYING SQUIRRELS? Posted: Friday, July 20, 2007 3:07 PMCategories: Tehran, Iran By Ali Arouzi, NBC News Producer You can tell that Iran is feeling a little beleaguered these days when there are reports that Tehran may be under attack from rodents! That is what the official Islamic Republic News Agency reported this week, that police had, ahem, "arrested" 14 squirrels on charges of espionage. The rodents were found near the Iranian border, allegedly equipped with eavesdropping devices, according to IRNA. When asked to confirm the story, Esmaeel Ahmadi Moghadam, the national police chief, said, "I have heard about it, but I do not have precise information." He declined to give any more details. IRNA said that the squirrels were discovered by intelligence services – but were captured by police officers several weeks ago. 'Are you serious?'The reaction to the report on Tehran’s streets was varied – from disbelief to assigning guilt for the alleged infraction. "No, I had not heard about this, but it does not surprise me, foreign countries are always meddling in Iran," said Hassan Mohmmadi, a fast-food vendor. Mohammadi asked me if I knew where the squirrels were from, and I told him that I didn’t know. Then he came to his own conclusions. "I bet they were British squirrels, they are the most cunning," he replied. Meantime, an independent journalist, Sepher Sopli, was not surprised by the idea that another country would spy on Iran, so much as he was dumbfounded by their methods. "I read this story in the papers and though it was very bizarre; what struck me as odd was that in this age of modern technology, people were relying on squirrels to do their spying," Sopli said. But, the report was still strange enough to surprise. "That's very funny, but you’re not serious are you?" said Soraya Jafari, a student in Tehran. Maybe not a first Espionage not entirely foreign to animals. If true, this would not be the first time animals have been used for military endeavors. During World War II, Allied forces used pigeons to fly vital intelligence out of occupied France. More recently, U.S. Marines stationed in Kuwait trained chickens for a low-tech chemical detection system. It’s also well documented that dolphins have been used to seek out underwater mines. Spying is something that is taken seriously in any country, especially in a place like Iran, where numerous people are currently being held on charges of espionage. Still, the squirrels that breached the Iranian border carrying sensitive spying equipment must have been nuts. Well, I have a suspicion - some of the "Kermanshah 14" may be "my" squirrels. You know I feed every critter in the neighborhood, and not junk food either, but the good stuff. It's well known that for years I've grown the smartest, biggest, sassiest and boldest squirrels in the world; within the last couple of weeks, though, I noticed a definite decline in the number of squirrely visitors to my edenic environs; where normally I can count as many as eight squirrels visiting at one time, now there are only three or four. Hmmm, I wouldn't put it past NSA to have squirrel-napped some of my squirrels, delivered them to the Iraq-Iran border area and rigged them out with spying gear with instructions to infiltrate the local parks in Kermanshah to eavesdrop on the Islamic Guard...